Sweet Fellowship

This was written Sunday October 18th:

This past week I've thought of my family A LOT. I miss my parents, sisters, brothers, extended family, and friends so much that I'm crying as I sit here and type. I know the Lord is with me always but sometimes I really desire a good friend here. I'm thankful for all my friends, but I desire a friendship where I can fully be myself. I miss being goofy and silly and not worrying whether the person I was behaving that way around would think I was an idiot. I feel like I have to be so grown-up all the time. Oh to be a kid again! I wish I had a dad to give me advice - like about my piece of junk car or even advice on something as insignificant as fixing my broken couch. I don't like leaning on other people for that advice – especially when I feel like I’m a bother to them. I feel so.... helpless. I guess when it boils down to it I'm lonely. I miss my friends back home. I miss having even one friend physically with me to share with what God is doing in my life and in return hearing what God is doing in their life. I miss praying with good friends. I have friends here that I can talk to about surface level things like how my class is going and so forth but I have none that I can truly share my heart with. I'm sure a lot of this is a lack of patience. Cherished relationships come with time. It doesn’t negate my desire for a friend around my age to hang out with, pray with, and share with.

Today's Entry:

Today is Kenyatta Day, which is a national holiday in Kenya. It also means NO SCHOOL! I’m home and I’ve been spending quite a bit of time with the Lord. Yesterday I was thinking that complaining about homesickness, loneliness, and dependency on others is not very Christ-like. So I decided that I would count my blessings. I tried to think of blessings throughout the day and even as I lay in bed ready to drift into a good night’s rest I was dwelling on God’s goodness to me. This morning was a morning of sweet worship with my Savior. I wondered yesterday what I would do today all alone because I had no plans. Little did I know that God had better for me. Spending quality time with Him is exactly what I’ve needed.